Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters

I’m reading a most excellent book this week given to me by my loving Mother. I’m going to try to give his book to everyone I know that has a daughter to raise. There are lots I have to share in this book but I just wanted to write down an excerpt from the book:

“After we were married I quickly decided that some of my husband’s habits needed changing. For one, he exercised too much. For another, he spent hours at home catching up on work. In both cases, he left me feeling lonely. So I developed a plan.
For the first ten years of our marriage, I studied him (I’m a scientist after all) and identified what I thought he needed to change. I compiled a hefty unwritten list. Then over the second ten years of our marriage, I worked to help make those changes one by one. His “need” to exercise all the time? Nope, I don’t think so, not with four kids and a busy household. His workaholic bent? Not in my house. If he had time to listen patiently to all his patients (many of whom were my friends) during office hours, then he certainly had time when he was home to put the phone down, turn off the computer, leave the medical books on the shelves, and talk to me.
I won some battles and I lost some. Finally, for the third decade of our marriage, I’ve thrown in the towel and decided to leave the man alone. And now I feel embarrassed about all the pushing and prodding I did, because it all seems so selfish. I repeated phrases that you’ve probably heard countless times yourself, like “I need you with me more”; “I need more help with the lids”; “I want you to communicate better with me”. Most women have these thoughts, and they grind away inside us. We want our lives to be easier and we think “If only he would do this, then my life would be so much better. If only I could get him to understand this, my life would be so much richer.
Fifteen years ago, I scolded my husband for being selfish. That didn’t work. Saturdays he had a routine that irritated me. He would walk in from the garage, the metal on the bottom of his bike shoes clattering against the tile on the mudroom floor, and ask, “Do you care if I go on a bike ride?” It was a ridiculous question because he equally brightly clad biking buddies were standing in the driveway waiting for him.
Ten years ago, I pleaded with him to stay home and help me run the kids around. That didn’t work. Five years ago, I told him, quietly and lovingly, that he would enjoy his life so much more if he didn’t enjoy his selfish desires. That didn’t work either. Now, when Saturday morning rolls around, I simply say, “Have a good ride.” And we’re both happier.
When a man wants to ride his bike, he rides his bike. He is who he is, and - guess what? – he’s more than enough. He is a good man – a very good man. What I thought I “needed” from him, I had already. What I gave up was my obsession with changing him. My husband knew how to separate the wheat from the chaff. Women can lose sight of that.

AMEN.

Teacher's pay. Is this good or bad?

I came across an interesting website today that lists the salary for all teachers and administrators throughout the state. Pretty interesting. I wonder how the teachers feel about it. I wonder how accurate it is. I'm guessing that since it's on the internet it must be true. I went to Snopes.com and it didn't say that it wasn't. Must be.

Highland or Lodi......Hmmmmmmm

What a great story by my friend, Sean. You should read the story about his children and the lady calling the cops. I'm glad I live in Highland (even if it is the FFT).

Ready for the weekend!

Okay, so I realized earlier today that I STILL have to blog about a few things but I just wanted to put this down for thought for the weekend.

This must be my three longings of my core:

- a battle to fight
- an adventure to live
- a beauty to rescue

Ask to me explain sometime if you really care.

Sweetness!

On Saturday Jake had a hockey game up in Davis County. The kids to better if Jake and Olive are separated. So on the way up, both JJ and Olive fell asleep. I snapped this picture while driving a hundred miles an hour. Not my best pic but you get the picture. I love my kids.

Another one bites the dust!

Happy 40th birthday, Blaine. Yes, as hard as it was, I bought him the cool Utah hoodie.

Give me a "B"

What a cutie! (the jake-o-lantern was carved by me and Olive on Sunday)

Happy Halloween

We got together last week to celebrate both Jake's and Grammy's birthday. As part of that tradition all of the grandkids dressed up and posed for the picture. Talk about a major pain. Some of the little ones were crying because of the older one's costumes. Well, I think this is everyone.

Another "Teenager" to scare me

Happy Birthday to you Jacob Clark Davis. Okay, so your b-day was a couple of weeks ago. Still, I want to put this here. First off, I will quote a song that my boys love (but I'm not to hip on):

They're gonna clean up your looks
With all the lies and the books
To make a citizen out of you

Because they sleep with a gun
And keep an eye on you son
So they can watch all the things you do

Because the drugs never work
They gonna give you a smirk
Cause they got methods of keeping you clean

They gonna rip off your heads,
Your aspirations are shreds
Another cock in the murder machine

They say that
Teenagers scare the living shit out of me

With that said, Jake got a cool spider cake from Kohler's. He got a new D-stick (lacrosse) and a new pair of skates for hockey. What a great kid he is. He and I have spent quite a bit of time together during the month of October doing mostly homework but also football and now with hockey. Mostly, I just wanted to post the pic.

Blog rolling along

Okay, my younger sister (Krat) inspired me to update my blog today. I happened to read a post by one of the Google developers who recently added a widget tool for adding blogrolls to your blog. A long time ago I had created (more like hacked) a simple blogroll. I think when I switched over to the new Google blogger it got erased. Anyhow, you can see on my blog the sites that I frequent. Give them a read if you choose. There are some friends, and others that I've never met (but certainly feel some connection to). Blogging is great. I need to give credit to my friends Kevin and Rus for inspiring me to start blogging (1st post on June 15, 2004). Cheers!